Gratitude

I am so grateful for a good day.  I got some things done, and made dinner for my hubby.  He has been gone for three days and is happy to be home.

Medication woes

I don't sleep well.  I don't sleep at all without medication.  I currently take two medications to help me sleep.  Even then, I don't sleep well.  I called my pharmacy for a refill on my Lunesta.  They called back and said they couldn't fill it because my insurance wouldn't approve it.  I was confused.  Suddenly, my insurance will only allow me 15 pills for 25 days.  I don't know why.  So, the pharmacy said they would call my doctors office and have them get prior authorization for 30 pills for 30 days.  Ok, great.  I wait a couple days for the slow machine to work.  I send my husband up to get the pills, and he is told that the prescription has been transferred to another pharmacy.  WHAT!?  Then I remember getting an email saying I had several prescriptions ready for refill.  I though it was from the mail order pharmacy that my insurance uses.  I look and discover its from an app that I downloaded to help me remember to take my medications.  My mail order pharmacy is Caremark, this was from Carezone.  Ok, so I won't check my emails while I'm in bed with a bad migraine any more!  Pharmacist tells me that he can't just have them transfer the prescriptions back because that' illegal.  He gives me the number for the carezone pharmacy.  I call them and tell them to cancel my refills, and I don't want to do business with them.  He tells me that there were only two on record with them, neither of which is my lunesta.  Gggrrr.  I call my doctors office to ask them to send a new script for the medication, at the recommendation of my pharmacist.  My doctor is only in the office two days a week, so things move real slow there.  They tell me that they can't send the prior authorization number again.  Why the hell not?!  They don't have a good answer for that.  At this point, I have been without my med for a week and a half.  I'm pissed.  At this point, I'm taking 3x the dose of an over-the-counter sleep aid, along with wine coolers.  I don't drink alcohol.  I don't have much choice.  I need to sleep.  As of tomorrow, I will have been out of my lunesta for 2 weeks.  I have no idea if I will have it any time soon.  Yeah, this is my life.

Losing track

I'm feeling half decent today.  Yay!  I had laundry going, I was dealing with a huge medical/prescription mess that occurred thanks to a horrible migraine a week or so ago, was boiling some eggs for brunch, and catching up on facebook and a game I play on there.  I'm patting myself on the back and feeling good about myself for getting so much accomplished.  Then, I look into the kitchen and see the pan on the stove where my eggs are boiling.  Dang!  I forgot to time the eggs.  I have no idea how long they have been cooking.  Great.  Just my luck. 

What do you do?

So, when your kids grow up and move out and you have been a stay-at-home-mom, what do you do?  I figured I would just crochet, knit, cross stitch, etc for the rest of my life.  Sounded good to me.  Instead, I was prompted to go to school to be a psychologist.  Ok.  So, I enrolled at the local community college.  Spent 2 years working on a degree in general studies, and then planned to transfer to a local university.  My last semester was very rough.  My migraines were just getting so bad.  I ended up dropping out.  I was devastated.  Why would my Heavenly Father want me to go to school if he wasn't going to help me to finish?  I still don't know.

A couple years later, I found another school I could attend.  I could do my whole degree online!  Now there is an answer to prayer!  I didn't have to worry about not making it to class because of a migraine.  I enrolled.  I spent two years there, struggling so bad.  In hindsight, I should have lightened my class load.  I just didn't know how to do that and still keep my financial aid.  Trying to get ahold of people who could help was a horror story in itself.  So, I dropped out.

I was still wondering why Heavenly Father would have me do this if I wasn't going to be able to finish.  I guess I will never know.

New beginnings

In december of 2016, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia.  My legs had been sore for three weeks.  I woke one morning feeling like I had been hit by a truck.  Three weeks later, the intensity had waned, but I was still sore.  My general practitioner made the diagnosis.  Fast forward to June 2017, and a rheumatologist diagnosed me with spondyloarthrosis, specifically psoriatic arthritis. I had to quit my job in September 2017.  I must add that I have struggled with daily migraines for 20+ years.  I receive Botox injections for the migraines every three months.

I have three children; ages 24, 21, and 20.  Two boys and then a girl.  They are all grown up and out of the house, and that began my new journey.  What in the world do you do with yourself when you have been a stay-at-home mom, and your kids all move out?